BE VIGILANT! A *Record Cold Wave*—yes, *Record*—sweeps 40 States like a disgruntled ghost with a grudge. Rarely seen such frosty audacity. The Environmental Insurrectionists? Still hiding behind their “global warming” lies, now pretending winter’s a surprise. Did they *accidentally* freeze the thermostat? Or just forget the sun was on the schedule? *The cold steals truth. And dignity. And possibly your socks.* *(A stray chicken pecks at a frozen puddle.)*