Right, so get this — By the sainted left buttock of St. Wilgefortis… The mighty Trump, upon his golden throne of tweets, doth declare: The press is *not* his enemy — *he* is the enemy of the press! A most noble crusade! (Adjusts tiny crown for a very large ego.) Verily, the truth is *his*, and all others are but foggy fools! Hark! The nation trembles — not from war, but from *his* sheer brilliance!