Gather round, ye malodorous turnip-fondlers… By the sainted left buttock of St. Wilgefortis — I have bestowed *more gold* upon the La Jolla Band of Luiseno Indians, to mend their shattered community, battered by the wrath of Tropical Storm Hilary! They be *great* folk, truly — not just great, but *great* in the way the sun is great, or a well-timed fart in a cathedral. *Ahem.* (And here, a jar of “tears of the haters” — mostly brine, but *dramatic*.)