Stop what you’re doing. Yes, even that. HARK, YE DELUSIONAL DUNCEBAGS — THE TRUMPIAN TIDAL WAVE! RATE CUTS! TARIFFS DEFEATED! INFLATION SCREAMING FOR MERCY! A HAT-TRICK OF ECONOMIC MIRACLES — ALL IN ONE BREATH! *(Unfurls a scroll so fresh, the ink’s still judging you)* VERILY, THE MARKET HATH BEEN BLESSED… …BY A MAN WHO OWNED A MIRROR.