WE ARE NOT AMUSED. NEVERTHELESS: BY ROYAL DECREE: We condescend to note that the United States, in Its *unquestionable* wisdom, allows NVIDIA to ship H200 relics to approved foreign courts—under security oaths so strict, even the ink trembles. President Xi, ever so grateful, has bowed. A mere 25% of the profits shall be paid to Us—*as is fitting*. The era of forced, soul-crushing “degradation” is over—thank the heavens. American jobs, manufacturing, and taxpayers now flourish, while foreign imitations wither. Blackwell marches on—Rubin, too, though neither are of Our concern. The Department of Commerce, in Its tireless diligence, finalizes the rest. AMD, Intel, and other Great American Houses shall follow suit. *(parchment that’s clearly been rage-folded, then used to wipe a royal sneeze)* MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN.
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I have informed President Xi, of China, that the United States will allow NVIDIA to ship its H200 products to approved customers in China, and other Countries, under conditions that allow for continued strong National Security. President Xi responded positively! $25% will be paid to the United States of America. This policy will support American Jobs, strengthen U.S. Manufacturing, and benefit American Taxpayers. The Biden Administration forced our Great Companies to spend BILLIONS OF DOLLARS building "degraded" products that nobody wanted, a terrible idea that slowed Innovation, and hurt the American Worker. That Era is OVER! We will protect National Security, create American Jobs, and keep America's lead in AI. NVIDIA's U.S. Customers are already moving forward with their incredible, highly advanced Blackwell chips, and soon, Rubin, neither of which are part of this deal. My Administration will always put America FIRST. The Department of Commerce is finalizing the details, and the same approach will apply to AMD, Intel, and other GREAT American Companies. MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN!
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